This is the 38th e-mail message I received from Brian Harner, and the 102nd message in our conversation. It was sent on November 24 2020 at 3:25AM.
You're doing fine, Kim. I'm just trying to give you "1" final nudge in the right direction before I go silent. I really am sorry that my email seemed so harsh. I never mean to hurt anyone whose trying to help. I see the feelings you have hidden within your words, and would like to help, but communication with niceties is difficult given the current predicament. The methane hydrates situation has me feeling disappointed in ways that are very difficult to express in a calm and easy manner. Really, the only thing worse than the current climate scenario is a full blown pole shift ala Chan Thomas' research.
It's not just my own life's work going down the tubes. It's every Christ's life before my own, the torture they went through, the murders, the slander, the ridicule, the early demise, the wasted potential, all for seemingly nothing. It appears as though we've lost the battle to recuperate and rectify the toxicity that humanity put on every species on this planet. My sadness is overwhelming, and what's really difficult to deal with is that I still don't want to give up. Even though the physical barriers have reached this point, and every logical conclusion my brain can equate is screaming at me that I've failed and the game is lost, I still want to try... The torture is persistent.
I'm sorry I failed you. Please don't give up. All I can tell you is those that never stop trying will be rewarded. The interesting aspect of that statement is this might be the first time I'm preaching faith. Maybe that's what I personally needed to learn... I don't know. All I can say is that I'm sorry.
There were hidden ideals within my last email about machining specifically. It requires a particular mindset that bleeds into everything, and the sooner you shift to that mindset, the easier machining will be for you. Be as absolutely perfect and specific as you can be with everything. First time, no mistakes, no shortcuts. Keep in mind that I did not do that. I took my skill for granted... you've seen my arm. Of course the situation could be considered planned considering the numerology and sequencing process involved, but the point is to do everything correctly. Be better than me. Utilize my mistakes and shortcomings as motivation to be better. This was a similar lesson taught to me when I began machining. I'm very pleased to hear that you're doing so much for your machining future. I really am just trying to help. Thank you for everything, Kim. I'm sorry for letting my emotions sway a potential last conversation with you. I hope this makes up for it.
Love you,
Brian